So here's some tips for Semenya and anyone like her on how to pass as a woman so the suspicions of a bunch of old fuckwits from IAAF aren't aroused. Do this and you won't be subjected to a bunch of humiliating and degrading "gender" tests under glare of the media.
- Straightened hair / hair weave.
Nothing says "I'm a woman" for black women of the more muscular build like a long horse batty hair weave. Failing that, if you want short hair then it's gotta be processed, straightened and slicked to your head. If you're a black woman and you want to keep your hair natural then dreads or twists are acceptable. Steer clear of corn rows or cain rows as these have been appropriated by black male hip hop stars. - Make up.
Do feel free to cake on the lipstick, mascara and eye shadow as this will assure any doubters that you care about looking attractive to straight men. Jeter actually goes one step further and wears false eyelashes - a brilliant move that DOES NOT, I repeat DOES NOT make her look like a drag queen. - Pencilled in eye-brows.
It's important that you pluck your eyebrows until they disappear and then draw them in again with a black pencil. The eyebrow arc must be about 15mm above the natural location of your eyebrows as this indicates what you might look like during exhilarating, really super hot straight sex with a man with a huge penis. - False nails
Being a woman is about being uncomfortable and while many women have learned to live with 12 inch acrylic nails soldered onto their fingers, it does take quite a bit of getting used to. Like make up, false nails show that you care about attracting men and are willing to sacrifice being able to wipe your arse without lacerating your labia. - Earrings
Hoops and long dangly, sparkly pink ones are best. Steer clear of studs as men are also permitted to wear studs. - Skimpy knickers and bra top
It's all about skin, skin, skin. It's not just enough to wear skin tight lycra - after all, the fact that your body is 95% muscle means that your breasts are more memory than mammary. You need to reassure all viewers of your femininity by showing as much bare flesh as possible. Being nearly naked indicates your gender far better than actually being naked as women are modest.
Caster Semenya has actually been fantastic about the way the IAAF have treated her. She's said that she doesn't give a damn, admirable in a 18 year old kid. They are planning on making her undergo not only chromosomal and hormonal testing but psychological and gynaecological tests too. The mind boggles at what psychological markers they will be using to "prove" she is woman enough to run as a woman. Black Looks has suggested that what the IAAF is doing is gender terrorism a sentiment I agree with 100%.
Disclaimer: I understand the complexities of determining the sex of an athlete. I also understand that the suspicions are not simply down to the way she looks but the way in which she has taken the sport by storm. Additionally, I realise that much of this has to do with bias against Athletics South Africa. However, my main issue is with the stupid shitty criteria used by the IAAF to determine sex and the way in which this case has been handled in the media. Completely fucking bogus.
